Hello Kitty Doesn’t Have a Mouth

“In the past months, I have purchased a pair of Hello Kitty slippers, a Hello Kitty calendar, and a Hello Kitty story book for my little addict. This might seem indulgent, I know, but my daughter would probably tell you it’s barely adequate, seeing as how I...

Streetwalker Barbie Has Invaded My Home

“While she was napping, I carefully opened enough of the package to recognize that bright pink logo that was burned into my psyche decades ago. I paused for a moment as the voices of fellow hippie-progressive-feminist Mamas rang in my ears, warning me of all the...

The Four Day Birth

“Within a few hours my cervix had dilated enough for the midwife to break my water. The towels and pads they spread out were useless; nothing short of a wading pool would have contained the tsunami that splashed forth. I don’t remember for certain, but...

My Mommy Necklace

“Of course I wanted a present. I always want presents. (You reading this, dear husband?) I just didn’t want a push present. Why the hell would I want something to remind me of the most painful experiences of my life?” The story of my Mommy necklace is up...

Dinnertime with Toddlers

“I find dinner time with my toddler to be just about as enjoyable as getting my teeth scraped at the dentist. (Actually, a trip to the dentist might be more fun–I get to lie back in a nice chair, close my eyes, and there aren’t any babies or toddlers...